How to use your personality type to find peace in your home.

Personality testing has been around forever. I remember taking one for a job interview that I had already decided I wasn’t a good fit for. Sitting in a sterile white room with a metal chair for an hour convinced me of that. Not my kind of place. Anyway - somehow or other I’m sure you’ve taken at least one. It can be fascinating to read insights about why you may be the way you are and how some traits might be connected with others.

The Enneagram

The most interesting insight I’ve had into my personality in a long time is the Enneagram. The Enneagram models human personalities based on 9 different types. You can go down a rabbit hole into how the types are identified, but a quick free test gives you a starting point (I don’t have a particular favorite but there are a ton of free ones available). Once you have your result, take a look at the general traits of each number and think about where the test put you. Do you think it’s a good fit? Why did the test put you where it did? Don’t be quick to decide - The Enneagram is based on your core motivations and fears, not just your outward/assumed personality you might think of first.

Let me explain. I’m very much an Enneagram 1. Here is what the Enneagram Institute says about Ones: Ones are people of practical action—they wish to be useful in the best sense of the word. On some level of consciousness, they feel that they “have a mission” to fulfill in life, if only to try their best to reduce the disorder they see in their environment. I’m motivated to reduce disorder - organize - and be useful. All true. On the other end, Ones believe that being strict with themselves (and eventually becoming “perfect”) will justify them in their own eyes and in the eyes of others. But by attempting to create their own brand of perfection, they often create their own personal hell. Ouch. Does this feel true to me? Most definitely - I’ve struggled with perfectionism my whole life. While I don’t use this information to define me, I have a better understanding of why I might feel the way I do and am able to give myself some grace. I can tell myself “here I go again, trying to make it perfect” while also reminding myself that perfection is not always the point (or possible).

Now let’s pretend you did your test and you decide you are a 7. The Enneagram Institute say Sevens: Want to maintain their freedom and happiness, to avoid missing out on worthwhile experiences, to keep themselves excited and occupied, to avoid and discharge pain. You are motivated by freedom and happiness and may have FOMO. You don’t like being bored. Also, Ironically, Sevens' wide-ranging curiosity and ability to learn quickly can also create problems for them. Because they are able to pick up many different skills with relative ease, it becomes more difficult for them to decide what to do with themselves. You want to do it all and can’t decide which direction to go in.

How does this translate to organizing and peacefulness? As a One, I can value my desire to have order but also know that I might struggle with perfection. I know that it might be difficult for me to leave something unfinished or to accept “done is better than perfect” (post on that coming up soon) so I can work on acknowledging it as I approach a new situation. A Seven might not have the same desire to have order because they want to be out in the world doing all the things. Repetitive and predictable tasks like decluttering and organizing might be too boring for them. They might know they can be good at decluttering and organizing, but in knowing they want to “do it all”, they decide to do things that are more stimulating for them.

Myers-Briggs

Another common personality test is the Meyers-Briggs. The Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI) is a personality typing system that has 16 personality types based on how you perceive information and how you make decisions. While the Enneagram explains the why (we think, feel and do), the MBTI explains the how -how you perceive the world around you and make decisions.

Your type is a selection of the most natural of 4 opposite pairings:

Extraversion (E) or Introversion (I) - Do you find your energy from interacting with people or from taking time for reflection?

Sensing (S) or Intuition (N) -Do you pay close attention to the details or look at things from a bird’s eye view (big picture)?

Thinking (T) or Feeling (F) - Do you look for what you can fix or what is going well that you can support?

Judging (J) or Perceiving (P) - Do you like to make plans and follow schedules or prefer to be spontaneous and go with the flow?

While you will have characteristics of all 8 preferences, you will likely relate to one more than the other. You have the ability to make decisions as to how you react to things in life, however you will likely naturally lean one way more than the other. Understanding where you fall in these preferences can help you better understand yourself and others. Let’s see how this can affect how you look at your home.

If you prefer taking time for reflection to restore your energy after a long day (I), you might appreciate a corner of your home that is welcoming for that. Somewhere quiet, private and without distractions. If you lean towards Sensing (S), a big picture plan of “decluttering the house” might be too much for you - mapping out the details into a checklist room-by-room could be the way to go. Someone who is more Perceiving (P) over Judging (J) could know their need for flexibility and choose open baskets for shoes over individual cubbies. See where I’m going with this?

Who Are You?

I’ve barely skimmed the surface of these two “tests”, and there are so many more we could discuss. The results of one or many personality tests can be really eye-opening to not only how your brain works but those of your family members’ as well. Keeping these ideas in mind when something starts to feel difficult can help you pivot towards a solution that could be a better fit. Additionally, a deeper understanding of yourself can help you clearly express those feelings in order to help others understand where you are coming from.

Try using your results when you approach your next decluttering or organizing project at home. Perhaps there is a room in your house that is particularly cringy to you and you have never pinpointed exactly why. Is it because you crave order and it’s a mess? Is it because you get bored easily and it needs a refresh? Is it because there is no logical arrangement of the furniture and objects in the room and it needs to be shifted around? Dig a little deeper and see if looking inside gives you a better sense of what you need on the outside.